This week has been a difficult week for my diet. Last week I didn't go to the farmers market due to the weather and some other projects going on but I had my meals planned out and had everything I needed on hand. Since Tuesday I have found myself drained of energy as I drive home, feel so worn out but unable to fall asleep weather early or late, woken up the next morning more tired than I was the night before and that just makes for a miserable morning. Not to mention that I have had to be to work early 2 days and eat out 3 times and that threw off an already difficult schedule. So I have not eaten very much local or organic food and in my sleep deprived state I found it very hard to even keep eating healthy. I think that in the future I will need to have some frozen meals on hand to keep me from eating out when I feel like it rather than just when it is absolutely necessary. I also think that I have some sort of mental block against my cooking/freezing abilities which keeps me from craving my own home froze meals when I'm stressed; that's when I seem to want to eat out. I will post our food logs when the week is over.
Today I also got some mixed news about K. The Dr. called to say that her blood work looked fine but that because she was still failing to thrive and was having poor wt gain that we should visit a nutritionist to do some calorie counts and look closer at her diet. If that doesn't work than its time to see the specialists. Ks wt gain problem is at odds with my obesity and quest to eat lean. Its so hard for me to see her size as a problem when my sister and I were both extremely small, low wt babies and kids. I find myself wishing I had her problem. But I also try very not to project any negatives on her and her eating habits. I don't want to push food on her all the time or pressure her to do anything that she is not already inclined to do for fear of doing some harm or instilling habits in her that will not be helpful in the future. If I give her the idea that she has to eat a lot now, when she is skinny, she may carry that into her adult life, when there is not a wt problem, and that would not serve her well. I would rather teach her to eat at meal times if she is hungry.